April Banter 2026

[Jebman]

This is likely the biggest western US trough ever experienced since records began! The same incredible Pacific trough that is bringing catastrophic snows to California ski resorts for the next three days, is the very same brobdingnagian trough that is bringing badly needed rains to the severely desertified regions of south central Texas tonight through Wednesday! There is a brobdingnagian blob of rain in W TX heading eastbound to Austin and will hammer most of central and eastern Texas.

[Jebman]

Okay correction. It has just been brought to my attention that 99.99999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999999 percent of the forcing in Texas will be 400 miles north of Buda.

We Always Get Missed.

Therefore I will see five minutes of drizzle. 

One thing I really CRAVE for, is a super El Nino with rain amounts about 99 decillion percent above normal for Fall and Winter 2026-2027. I want so damn much rain in south central Texas that the river that runs thru Austin ends up putting Buda under 150 feet of water.

You know, I am so fracking crazy about humanitarian-disaster-level rains, that I actually wish the Cabal was still in power and they set out to destroy Texas with Biblical rains. They had the power. Now, that will never happen. I'd have adored that! Being in the news about a Harvey-like tropical storm that somehow had so much moisture and swirled over Buda for 9 months with meters of rainwaters. I'd have been out on a monumental historic jebwalk checking out water levels!

I have always craved for a severe flood. I have been around for 62 years and I have NEVER been in a real flood. I am NOT thankful to g-d. The only thing that I will ever express gratitude for, is a devastating flood with many meters of water that I am in.

I want a 9 billion, 999 decillion milennial El Nino in Texas this autumn. We need 70 percent of the people out of here anyway. I want severe floods like in The Bible. Too damn BAD I missed that.

FUCK SNOW. I want Waterworld-like rain amounts.

[Jebman]

Orange and red radar returns are directly over Mammoth.

Mammoth has light flurries. It's 28 degrees with winds to 60 mph. Roads are mainly wet.

I have never in my entire life, ever seen such a sucky suck COC winter at Mammoth. And while I am at it, THIS IS NOT CHURCH! COC is NOT spelled COC. It is C-O-C-K! Get this damned message board whipped into shape! NOW!

It's high spring at Mammoth now. Snowpack on the slopes is thin. Skiers are being warned of hidden obstacles.

I hope we get such a record, devastating super ultra El Nino this year, that Mammoth gets 240 feet of snow, and Buda gets 500 inches of rain.

I am completely, utterly DISGUSTED with this suck ass winter in the Sierra.

This winter is so horrible at Mammoth, with wet streets at 28 degrees with light flurries under stark red/orange returns, that we need to change the NAME, to the DMV Resort. The Washington DC Resort. Because even at 11,000 feet, Mammoth has light flurries and wet roads just like Northern Virginia in mid January. And it sucks gigantic GOAT BALLS!

[Jebman]

Well well well I was looking at an older picture of the Woolly Camera. I reloaded it and man that place is a snow globe, with 4 inches on the Woolly Lot. That snow is blowing all over the place and visibilities are shot all to hell and back! Even the Village Level has an inch of snow and even there the snow is so heavy its unbelievable. You have to keep refreshing the damn camera! I was looking at what was likely a 5 hours old image. Well it's updated and that place is getting so fracking DEMOLISHED!

https://www.mammothmountain.com/on-the-mountain/mammoth-webcam/woolly-cam

https://www.mammothmountain.com/on-the-mountain/mammoth-webcam/the-village

At the Woolly Lot level snow is now coming down so fracking HARD that you can't even see the ground! They are just getting utterly DESTROYED by torrential snow that is being whipped into a milkshake froth! I'd estimate 4-5 inches on the Lot with drifts on the steps to 9 inches, temp is 26 and falling!

The forecast for tonight WAS 9-13 inches. They just updated it to 14 to 20 inches! I am gonna stay up all damn NIGHT LONG!

Its a gray froth, wind is simply BLASTING that heavy snow sideways so hard, it's a grey froth and piling up.

In other news the line of impressive storms in Texas will clip us to the north in all likelihood I will end up with 5 minutes of drizzle/light rain.

But that SNOW in Mammoth is UNDENIABLE! It is just POURING DOWN in a gray froth!

Plow guy has arrived on the Woolly Lot at 3am Texas time. Snow looks to be about 6-7 inches deep. Still pouring down and blowing like a wild banshee!

[nw baltimore wx]

15 hours ago, CAPE said:

@nw baltimore wx

How's the DFH event going?

It was a blast! I liked the 120 a lot. Enough to pick up a four pack of that and the WWS.  Sam Calagione got annoyed with me because I kept asking when they were bringing back Palo Santo Marron. 

[CAPE]

2 minutes ago, nw baltimore wx said:

It was a blast! I liked the 120 a lot. Enough to pick up a four pack of that and the WWS.  Sam Calagione got annoyed with me because I kept asking when they were bringing back Palo Santo Marron. 

Which WWS? The one they had at their store in Rehoboth was the Wake Up version from a few years ago. Its good and I bought some but I like the Triple Decadence better. Maybe they had it but I didn't see it in my inebriated state lol.

[nw baltimore wx]

23 minutes ago, CAPE said:

Which WWS? The one they had at their store in Rehoboth was the Wake Up version from a few years ago. Its good and I bought some but I like the Triple Decadence better. Maybe they had it but I didn't see it in my inebriated state lol.

I guess I was more tipsy than I thought yesterday. I just looked to see which WWS I purchased, but apparently I bought two 4 packs of the 120.  

[CAPE]

1 hour ago, nw baltimore wx said:

I guess I was more tipsy than I thought yesterday. I just looked to see which WWS I purchased, but apparently I bought two 4 packs of the 120.  

Good thing you like it. 

[Jebman]

Mammoth got 18 inches. Palisades got 24 inches. Snow is still falling.

Buda got about 7 inches of MISSED RAIN. The huge line moved northeast and severe drought is assured for Buda. We got missed. Par for the Course per usual. This happens all the time. Dry as a vile popcorn fart and people moving in and the entire Kyle/Buda Metroplex is being constructed up far faster than Dubai in the past 50 years, in only 3 years. We are gonna run out of water. When we do, cost of the water will be extremely high and few will be able to afford it. South Central Texas will have to extensively process Gulf of Mexico water and this will cost everyday people so much that a very good thing will finally happen to Texas: Depopulation! Everyone will move to Redstone in Alabama where all the jobs are and they get a ton of rain. No one ever realized the frightening Magnitude of the Drought of the 21st Century in Texas. You gotta have the water to LIVE and water is going to be extremely expensive. Many folks will end up moving, to literally greener pastures in the Mid South where they get 90 inches of rain a year.

I have been weeding mom's flowerbeds and I have never in all my born days, ever seen her rosebushes so short. In a normal year I have to clip 20 foot long branches of the rosebush up front. This year, nothing. We are shit out of luck. It's obvious its gonnabe a prohibitively DRY YEAR. Mid April and we have yet to mow the damn lawn. It's brown as a Thanksgiving turkey. They are gonnabe fining people in BUDA for watering lawns. This is in actuality a multiyear drought and this year we got so little rain its record BAD.

[Jebman]

1 hour ago, nw baltimore wx said:

I guess I was more tipsy than I thought yesterday. I just looked to see which WWS I purchased, but apparently I bought two 4 packs of the 120.  

This, is one of my more favorite Gen Z tracks,

 

[Jebman]

Mammoth got 18 inches last night. They just got upgraded to a foot of new snow today!

[Jebman]

Mammoth is getting demolished by heavy wind driven snows right now!

https://www.mammothmountain.com/on-the-mountain/mammoth-webcam/woolly-cam

[Jebman]

Last night it was Dallas that got the floods. Today it was Houston that got all the rain. We're stuck in the middle with very little rain as the Drought of the Milennium roars on amid record emigration right into South Central Texas as millions of people suck up what little water is left. There's no hope at all for us and no hope for me. Soon, I'll be completely waterless and shit out of luck.

 

In other news today Mammoth got another 8 inches of snow at least as the freshies keep on falling hard. This is a nice reset for Mammoth and for skiers. Those folks should have plenty of fresh water as well.

[Jebman]

Check out Alpine Peak Cam at Palisades Tahoe!!!

They got well over two feet of snow and it is STILL POURING HUGE AGGREGATES!

https://www.palisadestahoe.com/mountain-information/webcams#tab=alpine

The 8200 foot Scope - They cleared that platform earlier today with a snow blower, well it has a 3 foot drift covering it! I think Palisades got 2 feet just today, not counting the 16 to 26 inches last night! Wow man this is an all-out atmospheric river for Palisades! Mammoth was too far south for the river.

https://www.palisadestahoe.com/mountain-information/webcams#tab=palisades

[Jebman]

It's hard to comprehend why these Texas forecasters keep right on predicting 4 to 10 inches of rain for our region (Life-threatening flash flooding for Austin Metro Region, including Buda)(This is the STUPIDEST FORECAST I have ever seen!! Stupid! Stupid! Stupid! The forecast is utterly STUPID! The forecasters are utterly STUPID!) when by now it should be obvious that Houston will have torrential rain throughout the night into Monday and Austin and vicinity will have occasional sprinkles with maybe a wetting to perhaps a quarter inch of rain thru Monday night. I am no meteorologist but why do they keep on paying these Mets down here big money for crazy forecasts nearly a FOOT of rain, when Buda usually does not see that much in 10 months? We usually don't see that much in 2 years!!!!

I think the NWS down here needs to go back to weather school. This shit is getting ridiculous. 

I am getting warnings on my phone! I know damn well I'm not getting a half inch of rain through May 15! We are in a DROUGHT.

Drop these ridiculous warnings for Austin and Hays County NOW!

I'm sorry Austin forecasters. I realize you are on The Spectrum and can't codify a weather forecast to save your miserable lives! OK.

Here it is: Sunday night for the Austin Metropolitan Region including Buda, Sprinkles overnight, Wetting to quarter inch of rain at most. Monday, Mostly cloudy with a 30 percent chance of a passing shower, maybe one sixty-fourth of an inch of rain. Rest of the week partly cloudy, SE winds, highs in the upper 70s to low 80s, lows near 67. The southeasterlies will maintain low level humidity into the foreseeable future.

Forecasters can't add, subtract, multiply or divide fractions. I apologize for hurting your poor liddle brains with that one sixty-fourth of an inch fraction. Man, I know that hurt BAD! Even worse than the hellish Buda drought!

Warn Houston, any moron can see they are in full flood stage and will stay there through Thursday at least! All the rain is training over them and will through Monday morning!

Where do these stupid Texan meteorologists come from? Oh wait, all the experts got fired by YOU KNOW WHO!

[nj2va]

What a fun final round of the Masters today. Way to go Rory!