Jebman

Too damn BAD I am an old man. I will never ever figure out how to get that epic split flow on my avatar. It's 2024 and I got lost millennia ago lmfao

EPIC sig material

I am gonna win the snowfall contest. NO ONE forecast near as much snow, as I did. We ARE gonna get that snow. You better get about twenty shovels and a metric ton of whatever you use to stay awake because we are gonna be trackin' DAY AND NIGHT! We are gonna be tracking storms so much the models will be in our dreams lmao. Except that these dreams will come gloriously true!

JEBMAN STANDARDS Just what are Jebman Standards? Jebman standards are not for the faint hearted or lazy. If you aim to shovel by Jebman Standards you are channeling my enthusiasm for digging snow at its best. Warning: Most people will think you are crazy. That said you will be doing the best shoveling job ever seen. NO ONE shovels by Jebman Standards. Most people are too damn lazy. You will be setting a very high bar for snow shoveling standards. You lovingly shovel all the snow on all of your walkways. Full width! Get a scraper. Pile the snow on the north sides of sunlight blocking objects. Pile it ridiculously high along the sidewalks. Shovel all of the snow from EIGHT FEET around cars and trucks. No exceptions!!!!!!!! Use this snow to make seriously tall piles! Wave your freak flag high! When I made my Dad weep with embarrassment, I knew I was truly accomplishing Jebman Standards. I was totally unabashed about my adoration of snow, ice and vodka cold at all times. If you are shoveling the snow on the corners of a block, say in Dale City, where the sidewalk becomes 8 to 10 feet wide, shovel the FULL SIDEWALK WIDTH!!!!!!! Pile that snow very very high! When you do that, you will TRULY be channeling your inner Jebman! Publish photos of your handiwork online too! Plows love to make twenty foot piles of snow at corners during KU magnitude snowstorms! Make a three foot wide path thru that pile, just to demonstrate to everyone that you indeed CAN shovel by true Jebman Standards! You don't want to make pedestrians have to walk around that KU Pile! You know what to do with the snow! Pile it up very high! Show everyone how much you love snow! That's the whole idea! You need to shovel all of the snow from your driveway entrance! Pile it all up! If the plow seals you in with an eleven foot snow berm, dig that too! The whole idea is to be lovingly obsessed with snow! Pile the snow extremely high! Bonus standards: Remove snow from the road and Pile it up! I used to send my dad into an embarrassed rage doing that! I was so terminally obsessed with snow! Everyone in Glendale in Dale City knew it! I often did a better job removing snow than the Plows lmfao!!!!!! Key here is remove every last bit of the snow with a shovel and Pile it up!

Just wow! It is high time for all out snow mania! Workin on some snow manifestos lmao There is so much potent sugar up in here, that we will all have terminal diabetes by Feb 15! Might need some serious anti bipolar meds lmfao too! Anyone up for the 00z model runs lol? And the 6z model runs? Is it possible we could be setting up for March 13 1993 but this time the storm is 40/70 Benchmark for Washington DC? Meaning in kindergarten English, that the area of torrential snow obliterates the DC area, instead of the Alleghenies like last time? We need a massive DT WOOF!!!!!!!

Okay now I see why everyone is so damned excited lmao! Get stocked up on whatever you use to stay awake! Stock up on shovels, snowblowers and a billion of the best IPA's! You guys are about a quintillion times more excited about snow than I have ever been earlier this season! Everyone is talkin' KU's and BECS'ses! Dr. Seuss and weather? Damn you guys caught the snow mania really, superlatively BAD this time! PSU is full-on Jebman Excited about snow! Never seen this! Strap yourselves in tight, gonna be an exciting wild ride!

Wow you guys are getting Jebman Crazy about snow! What did I miss?

I'll dig it. I'll demonstrate Jebman Standards, too.

I was at Massanutten. They got 18 inches. Dale City got like 12-14. It was a THRILL traveling on I 81 in a total whiteout. Good times. That trip was a total story in itself. We got to the motel the night before. We had rain/snow at 500 feet. It started accumulating on the mulch. Then it became nearly all snow and continued into the next day. I got up at 615am and undertook a most excellent jebwalk, WITH MY SHOVEL, along this road, got to dig ppl out, and the snow poured and poured and poured while I blasted tracks on my headphones that reminded me of snow. I enthusiastically shoveled fresh snow where ever people needed help. I was in ultimate heaven to say the least. That northeast wind forced me to walk backwards against the huge aggregates, especially on my way back. Needless to say my friends back at the motel were really concerned. I was gone for hours and hours worshipping snow and vodka cold and relishing the experience! We went skiing, but not I. I was taking notes and blasting ELO and Billy Joel on my headphones and walking around, running around too. Some people were gawking at me and my excited antics. I didnt care! I loved snow and cold and absolutely adored it! The snow was wet at first but then it fell into the upper teens and the snow got drier and the NE wind picked up and things got very fun as snow piled up and visibilities went straight to hell. It was at this time we decided to try and get home. We left early the next morning. The wind was blasting heavy dry snow all over the place and I was grinning ear to ear and trying to shovel more of the snow with my Jebman Shovel lmao. That wind was really blowing the snow around and I was really whooping it up like an overexcited teenager! We got on I 81 and tried so hard to get back but the whiteout was total and I have never been so happy and fulfilled in my entire life! We were going right off the road and I whooped it right up with one of my trademark WOOOOOO-HOOOOOOO's !!!!!!!! It took us a very long long time to get back. In Dale City it was pouring snow too! I got to dig snow at Massanutten then at home and got to dig the fresh snow for all my neighbors! I demonstrated Jebman Standards! I was so happy I thought my snow weenie heart would burst for pure unadulterated JOY!

It's high time for yet another Winter is Over full manifesto. Maybe I should go beg the Reaper to reap me again. Man we ARE desperate. This is depressing. Ravens suck huge hairy goat balls in the world class hall of Shame and Winter sucks too.

They played like a bunch of drunk teenage broads. Grown men playing professional football the way they did should all be terminated and blacklisted from pro sports the rest of their short miserable lives. What I watched yesterday wasn't football, it was bullshyt.

I hope to G-D that the Niners stomp the Chiefs right into the ground in Vegas with no mercy at all! Damn right I'm a sore loser!

Once upon a time, in N VA, about the early 2000s, I was THIS obsessed with wanting snow in Dale City, craving my snow jebwalk and craving to pile snow up to fifty feet high! I didnt give a fooking DAMN what my late Dad thought! I was as angry as Mein Fuhrer! Maybe even worse! I worshipped snow! I adored ice! I wanted to show everyone how I could dance like Michael Jackson on the ice! MAYBE EVEN BETTER THAN MICHAEL JACKSON! I craved a BECS just so I could jebwalk down I 95 in direct violation of the Law and enjoy people struggling to reach shelter! I too was sick and fooking TIRED of people on this board talking about dumb shyte, instead of going over the models and obsessing over HECS like me! WHY DO PEOPLE THINK THEY NEED SLEEP?!! THEY CAN SLEEP WHEN THEY ARE DEAD!!!! We need to track every last model run! EVERY LAST MODEL RUN! ALEET! ALEET! We have a massive devastating HECS on the way! We got to track this ENTIRE favorable pattern! I WUB this video with all my snow weenie heart! This is how obsessed with the snow and the Ice we should all be! This man is a hero! HE IS AN INSPIRATION! AN ICON! His dedication and passion for snow would have done Kocin-Uccellini and Heather Archambault PROUD!

I can accept the Ravens loss but I am still a sore loserman. Dammit I wanted the Ravens to go to Vegas and beat the sh!t right out of the Lions!

I am always awake goin over models, but sometimes I am doing chores down here or doin endless yard work because spring is already here where I live lol. I don't know where everyone else is, they can always sleep when they are dead. We gotta keep up with every last model run thru at least March 12, because that HECS Extravaganza is on the way and it will bury DC in snow very soon! There will be several significant snows in DC. I don't understand why there are only two more pages on the thread every time I check in on this board! We got a massively excellent pattern in the making and a Nino Jet Stream on roids straight from hell and a HECS on the way folks! Tracker is gonna be screaming FOLKS !! and Bob Chill will have dozens of Huge Faces and DT will be roaring WOOF like a volcano in full eruption in Hawaii!!

Go NINERS!

Why on earth, did I even waste my time watching the ravens game. Why. Its spring down here. I coulda been cleanin the yard.

Need to officially shut this place down. No need for it. Mid Atlantic will get lots snow. ALEET ALEET! Might even have to channel DT with a resounding WOOF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

GB16. Jan 22 2016. Dale City got obliterated by 27 to 32 inches of snow. Wow when 40/70 Benchmark states what he mentioned above ------ You better get 300 Jebman Shovels. You better get 300 snow blowers. You better get about 45000 IPA's. Stock up on food. You better buy the stores completely out of whatever you use to stay awake. Because we are gonna track the living hell out of this pattern and this storm, for all-time! Everything I record is going straight to Drive. I will be obsessively recording everything. Because we got us a loaded up for bear George BM jet stream! We are about to witness history in the making. Nobody better miss even one model run! This is gonna be bigger than the World Series, the Las Vegas SB and the frackin' Olympics all rolled into one badass extravaganza, for krise sake! And blast all those tracks that remind you of massive snows past!

You hear that? Its the sound of BECS Inevitability. That you folks in the DC Region will be utterly demolished by torrential snows, is inevitable.

Lots on the table. We need to keep on trackin'.

I have been GUNning for RAIN here in Texas. Can you give Texans some of that good stuff?

HELL YEAH start the thread!

someone needs to use that upper air map as an avatar

DT's X post is fascinating reading.