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LongRanger

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  1. this is old but still fun:

    How Cold Is It?

    An Annotated Thermometer
    by Don Haugen, Pensacola Austin-Healey Club

    60º Californians put on sweaters (if they can find them in their wardrobe).

    50º Miami residents turn on the heat.

    40º You can see your breath. Californians shiver uncontrollably. Minnesotans
    go swimming.

    35º Italian cars won't start.

    32º Water freezes.

    30º You plan your vacation to Australia. Minnesotans put on T-shirts.
    Politicians begin to worry about the homeless. English cars won't start.

    25º Boston water freezes. Californians weep pitiably. Minnesotans eat ice
    cream. Canadians go swimming.

    20º You can hear your breath. Politicians begin to talk about the homeless.
    New York City water freezes. Miami residents plan vacations farther south.

    15º French cars don't start. You plan a vacation in Mexico. Your cat insists
    on sleeping in bed with you.

    10º Too cold to ski. You need jumper cables to get the car going.

    5º You plan your vacation in Houston. American cars don't start.

    0º Alaskans put on T-shirts. Too cold to skate.

    -10º German cars don't start. Eyes freeze shut when you blink.

    -15º You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo. Arkansans stick
    their tongues on metal objects. Miami residents cease to exist.

    -20º Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you. Politicians actually
    do something about the homeless. Minnesotans shovel snow off the roof.
    Japanese cars don't start.

    -25º Too cold to think. You need jumper cables to get the driver going.

    -30º You plan a two-week hot bath. The mighty Monongahela freezes. Swedish
    cars don't start.

    -40º Californians disappear. Minnesotans button top button. Canadians put on
    sweaters. Your car helps you plan your trip south.

    -50º Congressional hot air freezes. Alaskans close the bathroom window.
    -80º Hell freezes over. Polar bears move south.
    -90º Lawyers put their hands in their own pockets.

    • Haha 2
  2. How do various current wx station models handle normally-varying wind directions? Do any update the direction display many times per second? Many models display what the wind direction happened to be when that instrument was last queried.

    As most here probably know, air does not always move in a straight line. A real-time wind vane will show the direction changing frequently, for example, anything from W to N, or even beyond, when the average direction is NW.

    To learn, I acquired a low-end station because the maker was practically giving them away. When I know the predominant direction to be NW, this unit sometimes displays S or E or others because the wind happened to swirl a bit when the vane was last queried. A few seconds later, the next query might return a very different direction. It's basically useless for determining the predominant direction. Some better stations quote a 2-second sampling rate, which seems too low to me, perhaps because I am used to a wired, real-time vane.
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